Eight coping systems for facing world events

Last week we talked about some emotional and energetic first aid for when the news feels feeling completely overwhelming.

You can read that post here.

Those tips will bring you out of panic mode.

Now I want to get into some coping systems you can strategically set up to start caring for your nervous system in the long term.

It's an interesting time to be alive.

Change is imminent.

Learning some methods to take care of ourselves as we are called to rise up together to face these challenges is not only wise, but absolutely necessary.

Okay, let's get into it.

The news feels terrifying.

You've used last week's tips, but you're still kind of spiraling out.

What do you do?

1. First and foremost, stop hanging out with people who spiral out too.

If you tend to be a hand-wringer by nature, chances are you learned that response from a parent, grandparent, or sibling.

If something in the world is making you feel stressed, for the love of all things holy, DON’T CALL THAT FAMILY MEMBER.

You will most likely turn into two worry-tornadoes and spiral out into a dark, destructive funnel of DOOM together.

It’s okay to avoid that person (those people) when you’re freaking out.

OR you can set a VERY clear expectation that you won’t be talking about X disaster or Y issue with them and if they bring up X disaster or Y issue, you’re going to end the conversation or leave.

Put a fence around the issue and then watch that fence like a hawk.

Instead, hang around with your chill, grounded friends and family.

(Don't have any grounded people in your life? Find some on social media and hang out with them online. As you start shifting your energy, you will attract more grounded people.)

2. Start meditating for 1 minute a day. If you can sit longer, sit longer, but not until you’ve developed the habit.

Meditation is an opportunity for your brain to rest.

Your brain is always - ALWAYS - working. When given a minute of stillness (just a minute), you gain peace and clarity and perspective and sometimes, solutions.

The world needs solutions.

I am not suggesting you aim for enlightenment here folks.

I’m not suggesting you go out and become a Buddhist.

I’m also not suggesting you create a bar for meditating that’s way too high.

Five minutes of meditation when you’re just starting out can be WAY too long to sit.

Go for one minute of quiet, uninterrupted breathing or one minute of listening or one minute of a body scan. Then stop. Repeat again the next day. And the next day. And the next day.

One minute of meditation is literally better than zero minutes.

You don’t have to make it a big deal, just get into the practice of it.

(Then… you’ll actually want to sit longer.)

3. Name the feeling and then feel the feeling FULLY - then STOP.

This is an advanced practice, but I know you can do it.

It's simple, but not easy.

And it really comes down to setting a timer and moving past the resistance to feeling the emotion and letting yourself descend into that feeling without reserve.

But only for one minute.

I know it seems like I'm on a one minute kick, but our aim here is to support and sustain your nervous system, not overload it.

If you're feeling scared, one minute and get ALL THE WAY into that fear.

Then when the timer dings! You're done.

Pull yourself back together.

You can do this with despair, helplessness, anger, desperation, frustration - any emotion that feels overwhelming.

FEEL it for one minute - and then take a few deep breaths and get on with your day.

You will feel such a sense of relief at not having to wrestle with the emotion and the fear of experiencing the emotion.

Emotions are energy and are meant to move through you.

4. Take action.

Action is the antidote to fear and pain.

If you’re feeling helpless about a situation, you can always donate or volunteer - or both.

I didn’t say save (white people and fixers, I’m looking at you/us).

Find out what’s actually needed and see what you can do to help.

Walk towards the solution.

We are all being called to walk towards solutions.

5. Take media breaks.

If the news is starting to really affect your mental or emotional health, then it is 100% okay to stop reading and/or watching it.

There is ZERO shame here y'all.

The world will continue to spin.

NPR will still do their daily spiel without you listening.

And you can always go back to reading/listening/watching the news when you're feeling more emotionally and mentally resilient.

If you MUST KNOW what’s going on, ask a trusted family member or friend to sum things up in a gentle way for you. Or don’t.

It’s okay to just focus on you.

6. Find a therapist. (If you are a therapist, find a therapist.)

A good therapist is such an ally in personal growth and transformation. Things are changing rapidly in the world and all of those changes - all of that intense growth - can feel new and scary and painful and triggering.

A good therapist can help guide you through that pain and help you come out the other side.

Plus therapists listen.

They really listen.

Being listened to is healing.

Being listened to can make you feel whole.

Don’t underestimate how important it is to be able to talk through things - including scary current events - and have a trained professional there to help you.

7. Cut back on sugar and caffeine. WAY back.

If you’re an anxious person and you’re still eating and drinking a lot of sugar and caffeine, well sweet pea, letting go of these anxiety inducing items (that can act like toxins in your body) will help you feel so much better.

No I’m not saying give it all up completely, but honey.

Cut back.

After a few days off the sugar and caffeine train you’ll be sitting somewhere and think to yourself… ”Huh… my heart isn’t racing for no reason… that’s new… I like that...”

Sugar and caffeine affect our bodies like drugs.

If you want to feel better, you may need to self-regulate.

PS: Alcohol is sugar. Just sayin'.

8. Drop into Wordlessness.

In between the news stories, I've been learning to let my brain rest and recover by getting into a place that Martha Beck calls Wordlessness.

I read about it in her book, "Finding Your Way in a Wild New World".

Here's how she describes Wordlessness:

“The sharp focus you were told to sustain (in school) is actually a limiting, stressful, narrow attention field–-something animals only use in the moment of “fight or flight.”

THIS IS THE KIND OF ATTENTION WE BRING TO CONSUMING THE NEWS.

NO WONDER WE FEEL ON EDGE!

Dropping into Wordlessness moves the brain into its “rest and relax” state.

This state affects the whole body, releasing a flood of hormones that helps repair and heal your body, relaxes your muscles, and puts you into a deep stillness, with expressionless face and soft eyes...

And if you didn't get the implication, wordlessness means no talking...

Places that I enjoy practicing Wordlessness:

• staring out at a body of water

• watching the sunset

• staring into a fire

• sitting in a garden

• watching my fur babies sleep

• looking at the stars

• staring out the window at the rain

When I'm doing these peaceful wordless activities, I really am staring into the middle-distance, like a cat.

I'm not talking. I'm not thinking. I'm off in another world... taken in by whatever I'm looking at.

I agree that we need this wordless time.

Time away from the stories. Time away from the rhetoric. Time away from holding a hard gaze at a screen. Time away from intense imagery. Time away from all the words, words, words... and the subsequent stories we then play out in our heads.

I believe we need s p a c e from all of that.

You will need that space to keep an even keel as the world moves forward.

What's been working for you? Share your personal coping mechanisms in the comments below.

And as always, sharing is caring - about each other and our world - so please share this post so that others can have some peace.

Sending you my best,

Rebecca